Why YaReally Need To Learn GAMEPosted: May 2, 2013
This is a compilation of GAME advice from YaReally. Any newbies reading this – read this through, then read it again. Then read it again. Then read it again. Each time you do, you’ll catch a subtlety you misses on an earlier read. Then come back and read it again. This is a work in progress and I’ll update it as time goes.
On the Frame of Mind you need to begin with
YA quoting the Roger Dodger movie: “All right. Here we go. Get this straight. Sex is everywhere, okay? It is all around us. It’s not some distant destination. It’s not Everest. It is right here. You have to attune yourself to it.
You have to bring yourself into alignment. You have to find the zone, Nick. Okay? Do that, and I promise you a whole world will open up. Look at me. I walk around in a state of total receptivity. I’m like a fucking lightning rod.”
On How to Mentally Approach The Journey of Game
You’ve been presented with an amazing opportunity to take charge of your love-life and dominate the world around you instead of pinging off the universe reacting to the world around you like a pinball. It’s a tough road, it’ll take time, but it’ll teach you more about yourself than you can imagine and the payoff will be a life you can’t even imagine at this point.
… accept the pain and shell-shock of what’s happening as a natural thing and eventually overcome it. You find new ways to appreciate the world around you despite it’s faults and you learn to accept reality for what it really is: flawed and imperfect but often filled with good things if you look for them. You realize that people are the same, we all have potential for good and bad, and that all of that is simply societal judgement attempting to solidify shades of grey into black and white for easier processing and teaching to new generations and to keep society stable.
… PUA is a complete overhaul of your life from top to bottom, internal and external, and it’s a slow process to internalize everything. You don’t just read “okay do XYZ and that’ll work” and then do it. You’ll do it a thousand times fucking up or running into unexpected obstacles at different points in XYZ until you learn to handle that stuff and work around it…and the benefits extend beyond the pussy notch count. I can go into a bar as an unknown and walk out with most of the bar knowing me by name, new friends and social circles, invites to parties/events, bartenders bouncers and managers giving me VIP status and remembering me by name, some random makeouts and #s, etc. all stone cold sober.
On Not Fearing Approach Rejection
Rejection is only a rejection of your approach, not of you as a man. They don’t know you, they can’t tell how awesome you are based off the first 30 seconds if you aren’t presenting yourself properly…their rejection is completely not an assessment of your worth as a man. Once you learn to present yourself properly, you’ll get rejected less.
… One thing that might help is to get in the mindset of “I can’t control whether a girl likes me, that’s out of my control, but I can control whether I approach her, or whether I escalate the situation, or whether I try to kiss her, or whether I go for her phone number…so as long as I’m taking action, then that’s pretty awesome, because that’s something I can control and feel good that I’m doing, even if the girl doesn’t like me or it doesn’t work out.”
On How to Open (Direct/Indirect)
You can open with anything, as long as what you open with comes from a place of self-amusement and congruency.
When you think “How should I open this girl?” you’re essentially thinking “What can I say/do to earn this girl’s validation?” and you’re already coming from a frame of having lower value than her.
When you think “What I’m saying is gold, of course she’ll love me, I’m so awesome!” you’re essentially screening her for “Is she cool enough for me to let her hang with me?” and you’re coming from a frame of having higher value than her.
Girls generally pick up on this subconsciously, because they’ve spent their lives having to learn to quickly assess “is this person being genuine/honest with me or are they trying to get something from me?”
A lot of why “Who lies more?” worked so well was because the guys learning it felt like they found the secret invincible formula, so when they approached with it they were approaching from that “This is going to blow her mind, of course she’s going to love me” frame.
Direct worked because the guys who tried it were sick of going indirect and beating around the bush and wanted to just get their intentions out in the open so they were just saying “HEY. You’re cute, I’d kick myself if I didn’t come say hi.” and expecting it to work, so it did.
When you’re out of state and feeling anti-social and just pushing yourself into sets with girls you’re not even into because you feel you “have” to because you’re out sarging, most of your sets will go shitty or not open at all, because you’re just going through the motion and even though “Hey, you’re cute, who are you?” worked the night before when you were on fire and met some super hot chick you were into, now you’re coming from a place of trying to get her validation to appease your ego and so you crash and burn with the exact same line.
Eventually you crash and burn enough that your ego goes “Fuck it, this is horrible lol it can’t possibly get any worse, let’s just fuck around instead of trying to keep our PUA Batting Average flawless!” and then you let go of your attachment to the outcome and start self-amusing and suddenly shit opens for you.
The guys at RSD are opening girls with “DOG. Cunt! Whore!!” right now and it works because it’s amusing to them so the girl can tell they’re approaching from a place of qualifying/screening/testing them VS trying to seek their approval. This is also why Naturals can open with retarded shit that objectively AFCs overhear and go “wtf!! That’s not even funny, it’s just ’cause he’s 6’4″ and rich that she likes him, and she’s a bar slut!” lol Because Naturals are pretty much the kings of self-amusement…somewhere along the way their life circumstances taught them not to take hitting on girls seriously at all so anything they say is coming from the right place, VS the pickup newbie who’s ENTIRE SELF-WORTH AS A HUMAN BEING depends on her being receptive.
You can open just by staring her down and literally not saying anything for a few minutes, you can open by making retarded noises, you can open by shouting her down like she’s in trouble, you can open self-depreciatingly, you can open overly-cocky, you can open with long flourishing elaborate dialogue Russel Brand style, you can open with cheesy “Hey baby, do you like raisins?” lines, etc….the “what” doesn’t matter, it’s the “why” that matters.
Congruency and self-amusement are the key. The rest is just mental masturbation.
… “Triangular Gazing” (look from eye to eye and down to her lips and back up, it shows you’re thinking about her lips/kissing/etc. without being blatant) while she talks.
… End of the day game is like Poker or Blackjack, there’s still elements you can’t control and some random outcomes, but with proper strategy you can heavily tilt the %s in your favor. A lot of anti-gamer types are like “Ohhh look that girl shot you down, so Game doesn’t work, see?? It’s just a numbers game!!” and it’s like, no, it’s just not 100%. But if a guy with no game approaches 100 girls and a guy with game approaches 100 girls, the guy with game is going to succeed a fuckload more consistently.
On Having a General GAME Game Plan
1) Go to a bar on a Friday night. Chat up 5 guys and 5 girls WITHOUT trying to fuck them, just talk about plain normal small-talk (for guys talk about sports/chicks/videogames, for girls talk about relationship advice (pretend you have a girlfriend, this’ll disqualify you as someone hitting on them so they won’t be as on guard or bitchy to you)/congratulate them on whatever b’day, wedding, etc. they’re celebrating/ask them where the bathroom is or for directions to another bar where your “girlfriend” is waiting etc.) and exchange names. Do the same with 1 or 2 bartenders and/or waitresses and/or shooter girls, who are paid to be friendly to you. If anyone asks where your friends are, say they’re coming later but you got there too early, and if anyone asks you where your friends are later in the night, say they got too drunk and stayed in but you hate staying in so you figured you’d come out for a drink. Leave as soon as you finish your 10 sets. For a mixed set of multiple guys/girls, every person you exchange names with in that group counts toward your 10 sets.
2) Next weekend go to the same bar. Chat up 5 guys and 5 girls and say hello to any of the people there who you talked to last week and chat with the same bartenders/waitresses/etc. as last week.
3) Next weekend go to the same bar. Chat up 5 guys and 5 girls and say hello to any of the people there who you talked to last week and chat with the same staff as last week.
4) Next weekend go to the same bar. Chat up 5 guys and 5 girls and say hello to any of the people there who you talked to last week and chat with the same staff as last week.
Congratulations. It’s one month from you reading this very post right this minute. You spent 1-4 hours of each week for a total maximum of about 16 hours of your entire 672 hour month, and you have 40 people who, even if only 25% of them are regulars, gives you a solid 10 people who frequent the bar on Fridays since people are creatures of habit and like to go to their favorite bars, and they know you by name and you can make small talk or flirt with them for social proof.
For month 2, do the same thing, but do it on Saturday night as well, at a different bar.
Now you have two bars where you have a total of anywhere from around 10-80 people who recognize you enough to say “Hey what’s up man, how’s it going, this place is crazy tonight hey?” or do a shot together or what-have-you. You also have anywhere from 4-16 staff members who recognize you and know you by name and will occasionally give you free shots if they’re male bartenders or come up to you and flirt/grope you if they’re female shooter girls.
Do that for 6 months and in half a year you own your city’s downtown nightlife.
Don’t drink more than a beer or two when you’re out, save your money to move to a bigger city with a better nightlife. Also consider getting a roommate where you are now, or moving in with a roommate in a bigger city.
While you save your money up to move, you can enjoy the fruits of your socializing labor in your current city when whatever cute chicks ARE around want to suck your dick because you seem to be the most important high-value guy in the city who knows people at every bar.
Guess what you’re going to do after you move? Same shit, except you’ll be even better and smoother at it because you’ll have done it once before. 4-8 hours of your week for a few months in your new city and you’ll have all the social proof and pre-selection you could ask for, in a city where you have a better selection of hotties to fuck.
On Having A GAME Game Plan for GAME Noobs/Noobs New To The Area
1) be in a venue where EVERYONE feels nervous and anxious (aka a nightclub)
And 2) choose people who seem to have low-value lol
Where do we find this combo? Go to a nightclub and look around, usually along the bars or beside the dance floor. You’ll see a bunch of guys standing around holding a drink not talking, just staring at the girls. They’ll often be solo or in small groups and they look like they’re thinking about talking to girls but they just stand there, occasionally talking to their buddy if they have one. They’ll do this the majority of the night.
These guys are on Death Row. The club environment has overwhelmed them and they’re shell-shocked. They want to socialize but they’re scared as fuck, the same way you are.
So how can you offer these guys value? Right now they’re nervous and scared to approach or talk to strangers…so you can offer value by chatting them up. That makes them go “oh thank god someone is talking to me!!” and you’ll relieve that tension/fear they have because you’re taking the initiative and letting them know hey, it’s cool to talk to people. They’ll be friendly because you’re rescuing them from the shell-shocked state they were in so they’re GRATEFUL that you started a conversation.
These guys aren’t going to be rockstar player badasses with tons of friends and lots going for them, but they’re also not always losers, often they’re nice/friendly guys who are just shy with socializing and just froze up and are in panic mode and waiting till they get drunker and can relax in that environment.
So the value you’re offering is helping them get more social/talkative, which, in a nightclub enviro full of hotties, is HUGE value because if you help them loosen up who knows maybe they’ll talk to a girl and take her home! How much more value could you GIVE someone, you know?
To not look gay (lol) I usually open talking about the girls. Like I’ll stand near these guys being a part of Death Row myself, and when I see one of them check out a hot girl that walks past I’ll check her out too and then make eyes with him and be like “shit, cheers to THAT girl hey? lol” and hold my beer up for them to cheers “is this place always this good?”. From there if the guy seems friendly I’ll stick to girl talk but share some info about me like “man, we don’t have girls like that back home. I just moved here and some girls on the street told me this place has a bunch of drunk sluts so I figured hey, that’s where I want to go tonight! lol”. Note that I’m setting up easy conversation topics with this, because the guy can ask “oh where are you from?” Or “how do you like the city?” Etc cause remember he’s feeling nervous at the club too…so if you lob him easy conversation topics he can keep the convo going with you.
Also note how positive a conversation that is. It’s complimenting that girl, complimenting the bar, saying where you’re from isn’t as good, it’s implying you talked to some girls on the street, it’s got some humor to make them laugh. Combined with the value of loosening them up, the end result is they’re going to think “this person gives me good emotions and value!”
Now this isn’t gonna get you laid, and sometimes these guys are awkward/lame. Hell sometimes it’s their first night in the bar (I love that, I tell them about all the sketchy shit I’ve seen lol).
BUT, you CAN meet some nice dudes and build some small friendships. Exchange names and now when you see them at the bar again in the future you can say hi. Hell they may even be with girls and introduce you!
The gold mine is the totally solo guy. This guy is scared as fuck because he’s basically doing what you’re doing. Most of my best wingmen and longest friendships have been with these guys. After the small-talk up above I’ll say something like “ya I’ve never really been here but no one wanted to come out tonight so I figured I’d come out by myself but I’m nervous as fuck!! lol the girls here are so hot I don’t even know what to say to them.”
Now you’re relating to him and sharing some vulnerabilities so he starts feeling like he knows you. Plus it lets him open up about how nervous HE is. From there you can keep eachother company or try to encourage eachother to approach girls. Ideally you approach first (you’ll probably get shot down, THAT’S OKAY!! lol), just as soon as a girl walks by go “cheers!” and hold your beer out to her. She’ll probably just cheers, give a puzzled look, and walk away…but that’s more than your new buddy has done so while you laugh to him about “man I think she hated me lol” he’s going to go “wow this guy actually talked to a girl!! He’s way higher-value than me!” and from there you’ll probably both start talking to girls or at least talking to eachother ABOUT talking to girls which at this stage of your social life is just fine and dandy. You’re just socializing and making friends.
The nice thing about these guys is you know if they came out to the bar, they’re bar type people so if you two are still both solo at the end of the night you can say “this was fun we should creep girls out again sometime, you got a cell number?” and boom, you’ve got a wingman/friend who likes to go to the bars and since you both to solo you’re offering value to him because now he has a friend to go to the bars with. You’ve created a win/win situation for both of you.
When you have a few of these guys, you invite them all out to the same bar on the same night or over for pre-drinks before the bar and introduce them all to eachother. Now you have a little social circle you can build up from. It’s not going to be the highest value social circle where girls are lining up to fuck you all, but you can work your way up over time from there and build more social circles with cooler people and merge circles etc.
So there you go, give it a try. Like I say my best bar-buddies have come from this method over the years. And if I moved to a new city or was in a new enviro I would do this exact same thing because it’s simple and pretty much can’t go wrong.
Notice that nowhere in that conversation example did I have to admit I have no job or no friends or no social life etc. all that guy knows about me is “this guy is friendly, slightly less shy than me, makes me feel good emotions, and is offering me value!”
What I did was tell strangers stories my friends growing up told me about stuff THEY did, except pretend it happened to me lol if you’ve never had a friend who’s told you funny stories about their life, make shit up or exaggerate things that COULD’VE happened to you. That’s what early PUAs did with routines, it was actually similar to how a comedian looks at their day to day life and thinks “hmm what funny or weird or awkward things have happened to me this week?” and writes them down and practices how to tell them in front of a mirror. In fact a book/website/YouTube video on “how do I tell stories” or on comedy writing ideas might help you out a lot so Google for some of that shit. When you have a story make sure to tell it in every interaction so you get better at telling it, etc.
What happens is over time you start to collect new stories of fun/weird/awkward stuff that actually HAS happened to you. So you say “cheers!” to a girl and she goes “fuck off!!!!!” and barrels past you. Well that’s a story. “Man the girls here are so friendly. I was at a bar last week and said cheers to a girl and she shouted “fuck off!!!!!” and literally shoved me into my friends! I don’t know if she was hammered or having a bad day but wow I’m so glad you guys are friendlier lol”. Hell, steal that story I just wrote right there lol that just happened to you last weekend! Boom your first story! lol
It took me a solid 2 or 3 months before I started having interesting stories of my own to tell. 6 months in probably 60% of my stores were my own real ones that happened to me. By a year in it was 100% my own stuff because in a year of going out and socializing I had collected a bunch of random adventures and stories. Now years later I have stories of shit that’s happened to me that people can’t even believe lol
On The Mechanics of a Successful Hookup (Mystery Method A1 – S3 Breakdown)
Download and print out this Mystery Method cheat sheet
The following example illustrates how various conversations would fit into the MM model:
The general rule is tease a couple times, then answer for real.
Girl: “what do you do?”
Guy: “I’m the top fry cook at Burger King”
Girl: “lol noooo you’re a liar!!”
Guy: “Keep calling me names and I won’t let you use my employee discount.”
Girl: “lolol c’mon I wanna know for real”
Guy: “I work at (job).”
Girl: “omg I knew you were lying lolol I love (job)!”
So there’s a bit of a tease but then you let her have an answer. As you go from Attraction to Comfort (again using MM as a guide here), you tone down the teasing and only sprinkle it in here and there because you’re building a connection.
The prob with most guys who don’t learn game is they don’t tease at all so the girl doesn’t get a challenge or feel an emotional roller coaster of ups and downs, so it looks like:
Girl: “what do you do?”
Guy: “I work at (job).”
zzzzzzz…same info is revealed to the girl in both cases but one way was emotionally engaging and fun and attractive, the other was boring and handing her his resume.
The other way guys fuck up is what you’re doing now, where you overgame and don’t pull it back:
Girl: “what do you do?”
Guy: “I’m the top fry cook at Burger King”
Girl: “lol noooo you’re a liar!!”
Guy: “Keep calling me names and I won’t let you use my employee discount.”
Girl: “lolol c’mon I wanna know for real”
Guy: “ok I’m actually the burger flipper instead of the fry cool.”
Girl: “okay seriously come on”
Guy: “all the free burgers you can eat!”
Girl: “I just want to know okay??”
Guy: “what kind of burger should I make you?”
Girl: “sigh forget it.” (Delete)
They switch gears to asking serious questions when you pass the “hook point” where they’re actually interested in you (so you’ve entered A2 according to Mystery Method). They’re interested/attracted at this point so they want some real answers to make sure it’s safe to continue being attracted to you.
If you keep teasing, they get frustrated because they want to be attracted to you but they need some reassurance of who you are first and you won’t give them that so they can’t let themselves be too attracted and that’s frustrating to them. Eventually they’ll go “fuck it” and give up lol
So congrats, you’re making it past A1 into A2. Try pulling back on the teasing when you sense they’re getting frustrated.
Then ask them the same question they asked you and qualify their answer like “you’re not making that up are you?” “no I swear!” “Hmmm I love (her answer). You could be trouble for me.” That will take you from A2 to A3, and from there you start transitioning into Comfort aka C1
On Transitioning from Negging to Building Comfort
“Anyone have any guesses or suggestions on how to best tell when to start ‘getting real’ in an interaction?”
Look for her qualifying herself and/or chasing you. This’ll be subtle in hot girls, and it’s a little more than an IOI. It’s more about her “exposing herself” or “throwing herself out there” or “making herself vulnerable”.
The key that goes hand-in-hand with that is “did I EARN this interest?”. That’s where experience and understanding the game comes in. A hooker will go up to the ugliest guy in the room and ask his name, it’s all fake because he didn’t earn it. But a girl who you’ve pushed through some emotions and ran solid game on asking your name, that’s legit.
Her: “What do you do?” (setting a hoop for you to qualify yourself with)
AFC: “I’m an investment banker.” (qualifying yourself by actually answering)
Her: “oh…” (bored)
AFC: “…” (no game)
Her: “So ummm what’s your name?” (no attraction, he didn’t earn this, she’s just filling silence)
Her: “What do you do?” (hoop)
AFC: “I work at McDonald’s.” (shitting on hoop)
Her: “You’re a liar!!” (shit-test)
AFC: “No, I wouldn’t lie to a girl like you!” or “You got me, I’m really an investment banker” (backtracking, failing shit-test, seeking approval)
Her: “Wow, that’s SO interesting. You’re so fascinating. What’s your name?” (no attraction, she’s just shit-testing)
Her: “What do you do?” (hoop)
PUA: “I work at McDonald’s.” (pass)
Her: “You’re a liar!!” (shit-test)
PUA: “No fries for you!” (congruent and passing shit-test)
Her: “:O OMG…I can’t believe you said that.” (shit-test)
PUA: “Get used to it, so many things about me are unbelievable.” (congruent/unapologetic and passing shit-test)
Her: “Oh reall–” (shit-test attempt)
PUA: “Like how small my penis is. ” (shitting on her shit-test attempt)
Her: “:O” (fried circuits)
PUA: “It’s like a wet baby carrot.” (congruent/unapologetic and ahead of her, she has to catch-up, like the “No fries for you!!” bit)
Her: “lololol omg what’s your name??” (legit IOI, exposing herself, time for comfort, because I earned this reaction)
That’s working off her actions, but you can take the lead yourself if you feel you’re in A3 and you can start to qualify her…So say we take it from here in that last interaction and I want to know where I’m at:
Her: “:O OMG…I can’t believe you said that.”
PUA: “Could you ever love a fry chef? You’re hot, but hot girls are usually shallow. You’re not shallow are you?”
This can branch into two responses:
1) Her: “oh ya I’m totally shallow.” (not qualifying herself, spike her temperature more then try to get her to qualify again)
or 2) Her: “noooo I’m not shallow!! I’m so nice!!” (her qualifying herself, now I know I can transition into Comfort…if I get the 1st response, I keep gaming and returning to qualifying until she finally qualifies herself, then I go into Comfort)
This is why we had those old-school “I love a girl who can cook, can you cook?” routines. Their purpose was to see if the girl would say she can cook (if she’s attracted but can’t cook she’ll lie that she can cook or she’ll apologize that she can’t cook and hope you forgive it) and we’d know we can start transitioning, or if she would say she can’t cook (if she’s not attracted but can cook she’ll play it down or lie that she can’t cook).
This is all a really subtle chess game and you’ll fuck it up a TON until you get it right. And when you get it right, you’ll run into an some smokin’ hot 10 who loves you way faster than you’re used to and you’ll fuck THAT up. etc. etc. lol
So pay attention for “did I earn this, have I logically done attractive things in front of or to her?” and “is what she’s doing/saying showing some vulnerability in her iron bitch-shield?” and try throwing out a few “can I get her to qualify herself to me?” bits.
… Girls will surprise you when you get into the comfort/rapport stage more frequently with them. It’s part of why I don’t insult them and look at them all as vapid shitty bar slut whores like a lot of bitter guys do. They’re just like anyone else…if you cut through their bullshit persona and get to their core as a person, you’ll find a lot of them are much more complicated/fascinating/beautiful on the inside than other people who only see the exterior facade think.
… I actually like the comfort/rapport stage a lot. A lot of guys get bored with it and it’s just a necessary evil to them, but I really like to see what makes people tick and break through their bullshit exteriors to talk to them on an internal level. This is part of why I build comfort/rapport with people (guys, girls, old people, etc.) REALLY fast, like they feel like they’ve known me for years when it’s only been a few minutes…it’s because I’m getting to know them on a level that only maybe their best friends of 20+ years know them. Like they’re keeping everyone else at arms length but I just steamroll through that and get in close on the level that only their close friends and family know them…and often I’ll get to know them BETTER than their friends/family know them because I talk to them about inappropriate subjects that their friends would judge them for.
On Owning the Frame and/or Directing all interactions with Females towards the Sexual
So for me, I focus on 1) making it VERY clear that I’m all about sex and fun/non-judgemental/kinky/etc. in bed, 2) making it VERY clear that I’m not Provider/long-term material, 3) pushing them through a lot of emotions in a very short time (there’s a lot of “fuck I hate you. Why are you such a bitch? I hate that I kind of want to fuck you. Get out of here! No I’m just kidding, I love you come here lol” etc. and 4) steering the conversation away from logical discussions about what I do for a living, my ambitions in life, etc.
Often girls don’t know anything about my personal life before we fuck lol, they just know that I’m fun, I turn them on, and I make them feel good (instead of ashamed) ABOUT being turned on. That’s enough for most of them to fuck, yes, even the Good Girls. Remember when you’re spiking a girl’s attraction up and frying her circuits, they’re thinking with emotion, not logic. Calm, rational, and objectively filling out some kind of survey, a Good Girl would probably say “oh I’d never hook up the same night”, and if you’re a guy who’s boring/average/normal, she’s right, she won’t hook up with you the same night. But when you know how to access that emotional side of her, she’s not in the same state she was in when she filled out that survey or went on a dinner date with a boring guy and she gets swept up in the moment like the other girls because her logical circuits are fried.
This is why I don’t need the 7+ hours or whatever…I’m flipping a very efficient set of switches to lead to the type of lay I’m after (casual fuckbuddies). At the same time, I’m not going as fast as the Direct numbers-game type guys because I DO want to hook up with the chick more than a quick bathroom fuck as passing ships in the night, so there are a few more switches I’m flipping that the Direct guys don’t give a shit about.
A lot of guys taking girls on dates Waste time flipping switches they don’t need to flip, or switches that actively slow their seduction down (like bragging about their accomplishments without realizing they’re pleading their case for her to categorize them as a Provider and not put out quickly). This isn’t necessarily a bad thing if you like going on dates or you’re looking to settle down with a girlfriend etc. (although it’s very easy to go from fuckbuddies to BF/GF, you just see her more than once a week and open up a bit over time and the Oxytocin and human nature does the rest).
Like I COULD clean my room before girls come over, I’d still probably be able to get the lay but I know looking like a clean and responsible guy with a nice bedroom flips a switch in the Provider category, so why make things difficult on myself? Instead I’ll let my room be messy and leave a condom wrapper and a chick’s bobby-pin on the ground near my bed. What switch does that flip? The “definitely not a Provider…but probably a good fuck who gets laid” switch. That’s much more productive in terms of getting to my personal goals of casual fuckbuddies where she doesn’t expect any commitment from me or expect me to try to impress/woo her.
Early in the interaction, like when we’ve first met, I’ll bring up super sexual topics with the group (flipping the switch of “I’m fun in bed and non-judgemental”), I won’t censor my swearing (flipping the switch of “this isn’t a guy I could bring home to meet my parents, he’d be too offensive”), I’ll drop stories that make me sound like an asshole player like “ya I’m tired…well I don’t wanna say, you’ll think I’m sketchy lol Fine, fine, I had this stupid chick over last night. She didn’t even give head, she said she thinks sucking cock is gross…wtf is that? I’ve never met a chick that didn’t like giving head…and now she’s been txting me all fucking day and I don’t want to be a dick and tell her no, you suck in bed, sorry ’cause it’ll scar her for life, but I also don’t want to hook up with her again ugh…how do I get rid of this girl?” (flipping the switch of “wow, what a horrible person, this guy is NOT Boyfriend material…but he gets laid, he’s non-judgemental about girls being slutty, he has standards/expectations in the bedroom and he has enough abundance with women that he’s willing to turn down pussy”), I’ll talk about how I hate clingy chicks (flipping the “don’t try to get me into a relationship” switch) and how some girl I was seeing was looking for a boyfriend while we were hooking up and that I fully supported that because I just want everyone to find what they’re looking for whether it’s a fling or a serious relationship but that I know when you’re first dating a real boyfriend type you don’t want to look like a slut and put out right away but you still need to get fucked (flipping the switch of “you can look for a boyfriend while you’re with me if you want, so there’s no downside what-so-ever to hooking up with me” (note for the insecure guys: most girls don’t go looking for a BF, they’re happy with a regular consistent good lay that they hope one day they can figure out how to land)).
Combine that kind of stuff with the obvious external signs that I’m not going to be her Provider, like not having a 6-pack and Armani suit, not having a car, not having my own apartment, etc. and the picture painted for her is “this is a guy to fuck, not date”.
… If she txts “how was your day?” and you wait 24hrs and txt back “not bad. u?”, that’s going to fuck you over compared to instantly replying “boring as fuck, but my night is going to be better ’cause I’m picking you up at 7 for dinner. Wear that red dress you wore when we met, that was killer.” Again even if she rejects the offer, you’ve shown that you’re not a friend zone guy, you’re not her texting buddy, you’re a guy that if she continues to interact with you, you will fuck her (so technically her still interacting with you after rejecting you IS the IOI that she still wants you to fuck her lol, but that’s another concept entirely)
You: “we should hang out friday. 8pm work for you?”
Her: “lol I have yoga class then…besides i have a boyfriend”
You: “putting images of you bending over and stretching in yoga pants is not helping me not want to bang you.”
Her: “omg you’re terrible! besides you should take me out to dinner first”
You: “is this where I make innuendo about eating out?”
Her: “omg lolololz”
Girl: “So what do you do?”
You: “Get into trouble, mostly. I’m surprised you haven’t slapped me yet. You’re not like other girls.”
Girl: “lol noooo I mean what do you do for a living”
You: “you know what I DON’T work all week long to do when I come out to a bar on Friday to relax? Talk about WORK. Come on, let’s go dance.”
Girl: “What do you do for a living?”
You: “God, why do girls all ask the same questions?? Is this city just full of gold-diggers or what? Ask me something INTERESTING.”
Girl: “What do you do for a living?”
You: “Why are you talking about that at a BAR? It’s a BAR, we’re here to have FUN. Quit being WEIRD. I need to relax after the day I had, I was…(insert story, tease, topic change, etc)”
Girl: “Where do you live?”
You: “Don’t pretend you don’t know. I saw you outside my bedroom window last night, perv.”
On Text Game
My txt game is wicked-tight. When other guys send a lot of txts it’s just gay shit that isn’t heading anywhere.
It’s like how someone who talks a lot usually comes off beta and trying to hold attention desperately…but then you watch Russell Brand flirting with chicks and its like oh, shit, okay that can work.
The diff between how Russell Brand blathers on endlessly and how most average guys would is that everything Russell says/describes is designed to take the girl on a massive emotional roller coaster of ups and downs and mental imagery and innuendo and teasing and push/pull and leading etc. so he’s actually packing a lot of game concepts into his verbals.
My txt convos never look like:
Guy: “How’s it going?”
Girl: “Good u?”
“Bored at work lol what u up to?”
“Just hangin out”
“How’s the hangover?”
“Lol doing better”
“Sounds like a fun night lol did you end up blah blah? Because this one time I blah blah”
“Ya it was! I only blah blah’ed once and then we went blah blah”
That’s the kind of guy who should just be txting one word replies because his txting so much is just “filler”. Like someone filling in silences with “um”s and “uhh”s. Its technically kind of building a little comfort at best but there’s no game principles involved in it.
My txting looks more like:
Me: “quit thinking about me, I can’t get any sleep when I’m running thru your dreams all night. Jerk.”
Her: “lol o ya I couldn’t help it.”
Me: “I understand you’re madly in love with me, but you’re going to have to try to restrain yourself. I recommend that restraining involve handcuffs. In fact I volunteer to help you with that. Don’t worry, mine are fuzzy ones.”
Her: “lol maybe I already have a pair”
Me: “of course you do, dirty birdy. I knew from the moment I saw you. I can read you like a book. I know your SOUL.”
Her: “lol ur crazy”
Me: “I knew you would say that. Now quit interrupting my workday to tell me about your 50 Shades of fantasies, I have work to do and I can’t balance my laptop on a boner.”
Her: “lol u txted me!!”
Me: “It’s alright, you don’t have to hide your love. Now I have to go polish my handcuffs. Pervert.”
I’ll basically just fuck around and amuse myself but all my txts involve combinations of pushing toward sex, innuendo, push/pull, accusations and cold-reads, role playing, future projection, callback humor, us vs them, etc. so I’m txting a shitload but on her end she ends up distracted from whatever she’s doing being she can’t believe the shit that I’m writing to her.
I usually initiate my txting during the slow work day (around noon) and late at night (9pm+) because those are the times she’ll be free to txt for a bit. If we pass 1pm and she’s still txting back then I pretty much keep her distracted thru the rest of her work day. At night I’ll drop more innuendo and see if she latches on and plays back and forth with me on it, at which point I’ll start downshifting into more sex discussion (stories experiences curiousities etc) and sexting because I know she’s probably alone in bed semi-naked and I can escalate describing sexy fantasy scenes of us and get her turned on enough to rub one out before going to sleep…and of course she’ll wake up thinking about me and I’ll be on her mind for part of her morning.
Some girls don’t know how to respond to my txts so they look like I wrote up above, just little responses till I switch to comfort and they can txt more because they don’t have to be funny/witty. But a lot of girls will try to keep up with me and play back and occasionally I meet a girl who can actually keep up and we’ll both send off big page-long txts like mine above. The attraction with those girls spikes fast because they don’t meet guys who can have them reaching to try to out-wit them and its exciting.
For stuff like meeting up a lot of guys txts look like:
Guy: “come to Club Friday. Dress nice”
Her: “lol I have plans already”
(4 hours later): “Cancel them.”
And that can work if the girl knows you well and you have enough value already and if you’re just inviting her to a nice safe thing like dinner or a party night…but I’m shooting for having her come over to fuck, so I have to get some emotional steam going like:
Me: “you should come over Friday.”
Her: “lol o really”
Me: “well we could go to a bar instead but you’re a girl and girls take forever to get ready so we’ll end up being late and then one of us will have to give the bouncer a blowjob to get in and I have lockjaw from going down on you last night.”
Her: “omg!!! Can’t believe u said that. And we never had sex u must have me confused.”
Me: “oh right that was a dream I had. My bad. I guess that explains the whole thing with the goat. And how I managed to last an incredible 31 seconds breaking my former record of 30.”
Her: “lol wow u sure know how to sell yourself”
Me: “I would never sell myself. Who would pay for a night of disappointment followed by a morning of shame, regret, and being kicked out for my pretend early business meeting?”
Her: “lol u wouldn’t throw me out”
Me: “no that’s just the ugly girls. You can stay for breakfast, as long as you make it. In nothing but heels and an apron.”
Her: “lol that’s how I always cook”
Me: “I don’t believe you. You should come over Friday and we’ll cook dinner. We can wear clothes though, I look terrible in heels and an apron.”
Her: “lol just dinner hey? I don’t believe you”
Me: “well after dinner we can sit awkwardly on opposite ends of the couch with a barrier of pillows between us to ensure we don’t accidentally cuddle, but you’ll have to help me stack the pillows. And if you turn it into a pillow fight you’ll get a pillow spanking. Troublemaker.”
Her: “lol what time?”
So again a lot of what I do is pack a bunch of game concepts into individual txts. I can come up with this stuff on the fly because I’ve been doing it for a while and my in-person game is the same style. A big reason why I can build so much comfort/attraction is that I’m demonstrating a TON of my personality with these txts. Like after an afternoon of this kind of txting she feels like she’s known me forever and that I’m fascinating and I’m easily the most interesting txt conversation she’s ever had. She’s laughed, been offended, been relieved, been qualifying herself, been excited, been mad, been puzzled and mystified, etc. way more shit than most of her txt convos involve with normal guys.
When I can do this a few times congruently she realizes “okay this is how this guy is, wow, I want to meet him”, especially if I lead it into sexual comfort/rapport building late at night.
You could say “but YaReally isn’t this dancing monkey shit?” But the difference between this and that is that the dancing monkey isn’t headed anywhere. He’s in one spot trying to keep her there by trying to keep her attention. What I’m doing is plowing forward like a train and dragging her along with me.
Like with the dinner txts above I pitch to come over which I know she won’t accept right away. Then I go off on a crazy emotional rollercoaster tangent, but I’m always looking to head back to the initial invite and I eventually return to it. So everything I’m txting is heading toward my goal of having her over to fuck. I’m never just txting for the sake of txting or txting like one of her girlfriends or orbiters.
This is just how I run my attraction stuff. For comfort/rapport I tone the crazy down a bit and get more into deep emotional and sexual discussions…but again I save that for night time conversations, never daytime. That stuff is where I’ll get into pages and pages of multiple txts because I’m txting stuff like my views on relationships/monogamy and sexuality and jealousy etc so there’s a lot to explain but by then I’ve built enough attraction that she wants to read it all and she’s captivated by our conversation and she’s sharing her pages of feelings/experiences, so it helps build our connection. Then the next morning I go back to playful fun lighthearted stuff because I know the seeds have been planted and I’ve laid out my groundwork for a casual fuckbuddy situ.
At that point I’ve already run all of the game I would run in person, we’ve gone thru all the mystery method stages etc and I can arrange her coming over usually to “watch a movie” (when she shows up I just pin her against the wall and make out and escalate right to the bedroom, because we’ve already talked about sex enough that I know she wants it), but sometimes I can get them to come over literally to have sex, like they’ll ignore their ASD and admit they need me to fuck them (then they get nervous right before coming over and I have to run some quick lighthearted attraction game to get over that last little hump lol)
Anyway so I do a lot of txting. My phone is always going off and I’ll txt all day/night long if it means securing a casual FB without having to go to dinner etc lol. My job is lax so I can just shoot off txts all day.
Some guys have money and time to burn so they don’t mind going out for dinner and drinks and doing this all then…but I’m lazy and poor and don’t want to do that so i’d rather spend a few days idly txting than waste a whole evening going out, buying drinks, building comfort, competing with distractions and cockblocks and logistics, her screening me as a provider, etc. that might end up with not even getting the lay that night.
Wasn’t expecting this to be so long but hey, there’s a glimpse at my txt game.
Also the interesting thing I found is that if I stay congruent to my verbose txts, she’ll eventually try to keep up with me. Like if she starts out typing like “wut u up 2?” And we txt for a bit and I stick to proper grammar/spelling, eventually (when I have enough value to her) she’ll clean her txting up a lot with me and txt with decent spelling/grammar like a normal human being lol I actually take that as an ioi.
Never let her lead the relationship or make the decisions, especially when it comes to sex. It’s “come up and we’ll watch a movie”, not “do you want to come up and watch a movie?” It’s subtle but it’s important and flows thru your whole frame/interactions.
Don’t stress it tho, it won’t cost you the lay, it’s just something to keep in mind. Always be pushing forward.
“Girls get a feeling they don’t analyze each and every word the way we do here.”
This. This flows into the concept of “change her mood not her mind”.
“That exchange means nothing. I send nonsense, she acknowledges it. But on an attraction level it means she’s thinking of me.”
Legit shit right here. Good stuff. This extrapolates to real life interactions too. A lot of my interactions are just nonsense small-talk on the surface but there’s a ton I sub-communication going on under the surface that her and I are both aware of but often people listening can’t read.
“I think text game only works if there’s some type of initial attraction and/or rapport created.”
Nah. It’s just tricky because its extremely easy for the girl to ignore you, flake, wait to reply till her buying temp settles, etc. but it’s totally do-able…just not with the one-word Jumbotron alpha style txting.
The main prob is a lot of guys aren’t past the hook point when they try this one-word response stuff. But the girl isn’t attracted/invested enough to be intrigued, she just doesn’t give a shit and assumes you’re boring and nails.
So I’d rephrase your bit to “I think minimal alpha Jumbotron txt game only works if there’s some type of initial attraction and/or rapport created.”
“Text game just drags on and on and on never leading anywhere.”
This is your fault because you need to be leading/pushing. Example of how I txt off the top of my head:
“You should come to BarX so I can take advantage of you.”
“Lol I have a BF I told you”
“That’s alright he can keep you entertained when I’m not around.”
“Terribly amazing. In bed. BarX.”
“Lol no way I don’t trust you”
“Then you’re smart. I don’t know how I’m going to trick a smart girl into bed. I’ll have to roofie you.”
“Omg u did not just say that”
“It won’t be the most offensive thing I say tonight, you’ll have slapped me before we’re on our 2nd drink.”
“I never said I was coming to drink!!”
“No, you’re coming to gaze into my eyes on the dance floor while I grope your bum, but I figured you’d need a drink or two before your standards were low enough. But we can skip the drinks and go right to the groping if you insist. Horny girl.”
Basically every txt is pushing towards meeting up or implying that we WILL be having sex some day, even if she resists I’ll just deflect it or weave around it and try to change her mood and make her laugh or catch her off-guard or pass a shit-test and keep pushing forward.
Even if she doesn’t come out that night, she knows my intentions and she knows I’m going to push toward a goal. So if she continues to txt after that, she’s demonstrating that she’s attracted enough to WANT me to keep pushing and eventually win her over.
Most guys txts just go sideways instead of forwards because they let the girl direct the conversation. A lot of these “gay” “8=====D” txts are just going sideways in the interaction. That’s why guys get stuck txting and going nowhere like you describe.
Russell Brand does this well, and Hank Moody on Californication hitting on Karen while she snubs him is a great example to learn from too. It’s that forward intent overpowering her weak/half-hearted defenses (because she WANTS you to win her over).
Now there are girls who will just txt forever and never meet up, I find these are usually the hipster/emo/indie/nerd girls who think they’re brilliant witty sarcastic wordsmiths and think they’re impressing and “owning” guys, high on their own superiority delusions that the betas in their life reinforce.
The nice part about pushing forward with intent is that it weeds these girls out quickly because you push a few times and they deflect without backing down at all and then you know “okay this is a waste of my time” and you can cut your losses or try more chaotic game like starting drama just to see if you can turn it around.
“If you explain something and chat, they tend to be more communicative.”
Yep. This is why I don’t cry about how bad girls txt. They’ll txt me 2 or 3 txts max like “wut u up 2?” But I txt the way I write, with full spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc and I don’t waver on that or try “2 talk liek them”. So they shape up and start following my lead and type properly and we have longass comfort/rapport building conversations with multille page-long of txts.
Am I just happening to run into the only smart girls in the world? Or does it come down to setting the frame? The latter, of course, the same way a girl will be a whore with me but a Madonna around a Nice Guy. They fall into the frame we set for them…which brings us back full circle to the top of this comment: “Never let her lead the relationship”
On The 4 Types of Game
First off, some definitions:
– Laconic – James Bond, one word answers, slow speaking, only say what’s necessary, letting silences hang, etc.
– Verbose – Russel Brand, spitting out verbal diahrrea, lots of talking, filling silences, barraging the girl with words, etc.
– Passive – not actively pushing the interaction towards a lay, being happy with an “interaction”, reacting to your environment
– Pro-active – actively pushing the interaction towards a lay, trying to fuck her, not just get a number or a “chat”, making your environment react to you
Now as I’ve said before it’s important to understand that how you act in the bar is not necessarily which type you are. Think about how you act when you’re pre-drinking with your buddies before the bar…THAT’S who you are. Say you’re playing xbox and having a drink before you hit the bar…are you the guy talking shit to everyone? Are you the guy that sits silently only dropping one or two comments? Are you the guy who’s cracking rude jokes? Are you the guy who’s feeling uncomfortable because you don’t know some of the people? Are you the guy meeting/greeting the new guys and making sure they’re a part of the conversation? How are you around your family at dinner? Do you say one or two words? Do you tell stories and yap away? This is who you really are and a big part of game is being congruent to who you are, instead of trying to act how you think the girl wants you to act. Hot girls can sniff out incongruence, it’s a part of their daily survival because so many guys around them are full of shit trying to get something from them. If you don’t talk much around your friends/family and you’d give your best bro-friend a Jumbotron reply, then you are naturally a laconic person. If not, you’re some level of verbose. Bring that to the table and embrace it.
So there are actually 4 types of game, not just “high-energy and low-energy”, which is where the disconnect is coming in for a lot of people (like I always say, any concept that gets unpredictable results can be broken down further):
1) passive, laconic (low-energy, beta, unattractive)
2) pro-active, laconic (low-energy, alpha, attractive)
3) passive, verbose (high-energy, beta, unattractive)
4) pro-active, verbose (high-energy, alpha, attractive)
Examples of each type:
1) passive, laconic (low-energy, beta):
Alright I’m gonna’ shit on this one first because this is the Manosphere fucking FAVORITE. Every guy on half the forums thinks he’s this badass James Bond. But I’ve read a lot of Manosphere Field Reports and they are full of delusions. This is what most guys think “low-energy” game is.
Don’t worry, I’m going to make fun of PUAs later as well, so don’t let this make you feel bad lol.
But first a disclaimer: Like Scray says, if you’re established as high-value, you can be passive (laconic or verbose) because often the girl will be pro-active. But understand that if you just go in wearing a suit and post up against the bar, you are NOT high-value…you look exactly the same as the “passive, laconic” loser beta. You are fooling yourself if you think you look high-value because your pocket square matches your socks, and you know that you’re getting approached by 5-7s at best, and going home fucking them and telling yourself and your boys that you were just slumming it on a lark that night when in reality you were simply not high-value enough to get the attention of higher-quality girls, and you weren’t being pro-active enough to demonstrate your high-value to get them.
The reason you looking decent and wearing a nice fitted suit etc. as you post up at the bar isn’t high-value is because hot girls are SURROUNDED by guys who offer that at the bare minimum, and/or who ONLY offer that and have nothing else going on.
That’s why I say you get approached by 5-7s, because to THOSE women you are high-value…but to the legit 8+ girls, you are just another dude in a nice suit, like the 10 guys texting her and the 4 guys buying her drinks right now. You have to be pro-active to stand out because you are bringing nothing to the table that an 8+ hasn’t seen a thousand times.
That said, this is okay, this isn’t me shitting on you as a man and saying you’re worthless and fucked for life, it’s me saying take a SERIOUS ego-less cold hard objective look at your vibe when you’re out and ask yourself “am I actually getting the attention of the girls that I ACTUALLY want and choose, yes or no?” If the honest answer is a no, then it’s time to be pro-active. If you’ve been going home solo and/or with girls that you wouldn’t show off to your buddies, guess what, you’re not “good but slumming it”, you are BAD and it’s time for a reality check so you can stop wasting your nights out getting sub-par results.
What generally happens is after an hour or two of standing around trying to look cool, [an ugly girl] approaches him.
…usually a little tipsy/drunk because she had to work up the courage to come over and I mean, she’s had an hour or two of drinking with her girls while he was standing there looking cool. Usually she’ll open with something like “I like your suit!!”, maybe even put her hands on his chest to feel the suit (and stay balanced, since she’s tipsy).
The guy’s first thought will usually be “ah fuck, get away ugly girl, I want that hot girl over there that I’ve been trying to make eye-contact with for an hour but who isn’t paying attention to me at all, or has made eye-contact with me and is waiting for me to take action but I’m too cool for that and waiting for her to come over to me so I seem more alpha badass”.
But that girl will be persistent, he’ll realize he’s probably not going to get the hot girl he wanted because his passive “look cool” game doesn’t seem to be working tonight, and it’s been a while since he stuck his dick in something, and this chick is all up in his face so he starts flirting back. He rationalizes it like “well, I’m only doing this as a laugh.” and “I’m only doing this because it’ll be so easy, this is a slam dunk, I’ll even make this chick buy me a drink lolol I’m really a pimp despite slumming it tonight, wait’ll I tell the boys how much this chick wanted me lol”
The other option is that they don’t get the attention they expected/wanted, so they then, again “for a laugh” of course, bail to a shittier meat-market bar in their suits where the crowd is dressed shittier so they figure that will raise their value, but with that comes shittier girls…but that’s okay, ’cause they’re just doing it for a laugh, you see.
So why does this happen? Why doesn’t the smokin hottie ditch her high-value social circle to come over and open him? Why do ugly average girls come over and approach him?
Because these guys are giving off low-value signals. They’re just giving off those signals in a nicer suit.
Again, if you have established value, you can be passive…but again, wearing a nice suit and having a cool lifestyle does not give you established value because until the girl actually interacts with you all she sees is a dude in a nice suit who’s standing around holding up the wall/bar, taking no action, and not making his environment react to him.
2) pro-active, laconic (low-energy, alpha)
If you’re one of those naturally laconic guys, this is what you want to aim towards. This means you’re still staying mysterious or using short answers etc., but you’re pushing the interaction forward sexually. Everything you say is geared toward moving forward or getting a reaction out of her (VS you reacting to her), staying rock-solid through shit-tests, and this involves a lot of body-language and laser eye-contact as well.
Some examples of “pro-active, laconic”…the key is in 1) how they force the girl to react to them, and 2) how they’re always moving toward fucking…also not how they make a lot of eye-contact, their body-language is stoic, they talk slowly, leave lots of pauses, etc.
The jist is that the girls they interact with feel like they’re playing catch-up (reacting) to him…like he has a purpose/goal (whether that’s sex, or to get someone to do something he wants them to do in general) and everything in his vibe is pushing towards that while she stumbles along trying to get her footing.
Even with men, they’re pushing forward, forcing the men around them to react to them, often by asking questions in breaking-rapport. Like in this clip Tyler is dropping shit like “Do you know what a duvet is…” and letting the silence hang. “Just ask, man. (silence)” “Is it a problem for you to ask?” He cuts Jack off and says things that force him to react and feel like he’s on his heels trying to get his footing as Tyler pushes toward the outcome he wants.
THIS vibe is extremely seductive to women. The problem with most guys is that they THINK they’re being this, but objectively what they actually do is stand around trying to look cool and as soon as a woman interacts with them they either burst out a bunch of talking (showing that they ARE actually talkative, but were putting on an incongruent shtick by not engaging everyone around them earlier, which is unattractive), or they keep the laconic speech patterns/vibe but they don’t actually push the interaction forward…at best they take it sideways, engaging the girl but letting her lead the conversation or test them or screen them instead of them leading the conversation and screening and testing her. Essentially they end up on the “defensive” instead of her ending up on the defensive, which equals him reacting to her, instead of her reacting to him, which equals him reacting to his environment (passive, beta) instead of him forcing his environment to react to him (pro-active, alpha).
So you still feel like you’re a laconic dude and you’ve read both 1 and 2 of my points so far, realized my ultimate wisdom and suffered the inner embarrassment of someone hitting way too close to home calling out how your nights out actually go, and you want to fix that shit and get out of category 1 and into this much better category. So how do you go from “passive, laconic” to “pro-active, laconic”?
The key is in knowing what you want, and leading/pushing toward it. You’re like a train at full speed…she can throw up some resistance but you’re going to just plow right through it while she tries to scurry out of the way. Start qualifying her more, start testing her more. Screen her for qualities and don’t let her get away with not living up to those qualities. Legitimately be judgemental and force her to defend herself. Shit-test her. Let silences hang in the air while she scurries around in her head for an answer to your piercing questions. Approach her as soon as you see her, cut through the crowd, take what you want. Interrupt whatever she’s doing, it’s not as important as you. Force her and the environment around you to react to you. Chat with the people around you, even if you’re just making short laconic statements…show that you’re high-value and that people like you, but that you’d rather talk one on one with someone in a deep conversation, than chat up the entire bar. Engage the people around you in deeper conversations, not surface-level fluff. Ask questions that make people think. Scold a woman for her actions as an opener. Let her worry whether you’re mad at her, and then be relieved that you’re not. This is the style where you ask a deep question that people feel compelled to ramble off a long answer, and you learn more about them than they know about you.
Both 1 and 2 are laconic, but how pro-active you are is what makes the difference. The problem with being laconic is that your sub-communications better be tight as FUCK, because you’re not giving her anything else to judge you on. You’d better be locking laser eye-contact, staring into her fucking soul. Your body-language better be chill and non-fidgety, unafraid to grab her and pull her in and position her how and where you want her while you talk, with rock-solid belief that she’ll follow.
The other problem is that a lot of this is hard to fake if you don’t legitimately have abundance with women…you have to BE judgemental and screening. She has to believe that when you say “Do you like (such and such)?” that there is a WRONG answer to that question that will make you lose interest in her. She has to be a little bit afraid that she doesn’t quite have your approval or that she could lose it with one wrong move.
So a big key in this is knowing exactly what you want. Sit down and write it out. Write down 10 physical qualities you want in a woman (blonde, certain fashion sense, etc.) and then write down 10 personality qualities you want in a woman (positive, out-going, shy, sassy, ability to cook, healthy gym habits, etc.). These are whatever YOU are attracted to and would want in a long-term relationship. Then when you’re out, you screen a girl for those qualities…if a girl doesn’t live up to some of them you don’t have to tell her to fuck off and lose the lay, but you DO have to make sure she understands that she’s on thin ice. Ideally you should be giving off a vibe where she might not know how to cook but now that you’ve let her know you don’t approve of that, she wants to run home and dig out a recipe book and LEARN how to cook.
This is the vibe that guys like James Bond, Don Draper, etc. give off…but most guys jumble categories 1 and 2 and act like 1 instead of 2, because they don’t have the inner framework to support being 2.
Also if you’re trying to be this category, you can’t be gaming and fucking and number-closing uglies, or girls who don’t fit into your preferred qualities at all. That means no rationalizing that shit away as “just for a laugh” or “as a slump-buster” or “because it was easy” etc. Every time you do that, whether anyone sees it or not, you’re teaching your brain that your standards are not REALLY standards and you’re getting one step further from being congruent to this category. If you don’t abide by your standards, then you don’t HAVE standards.
So let’s move into the verbose categories:
3) passive, verbose (high-energy, beta)
This is the “dancing monkey”. This is the newbie (and often intermediate/advanced, sadly) PUA. This is what everyone pictures when someone says “be high-energy”. This is the unattractive clown, the approval-seeking fool, the loser that girls allow to entertain them for a few minutes but don’t actually want to fuck. [check out Keys to the VIP vids on YouTube for examples of this]
Basically any guy learning pickup that you see out at your local bar is this lol Obviously this is not just super un-attractive, but it’s even repulsive to guys to watch. I didn’t even want to look up anymore examples because it’s just too painful and I feel bad for the guys as well as loathing them.
The reason this is unattractive isn’t that they talk a lot, it’s that everything they say is supplicative, approval-seeking, trying to hold her attention, begging for scraps, etc. It all reeks of scarcity and insecurity and a lack of a strong inner core. It’s also not leading the interaction anywhere, not creating any sexual tension, and the girl is thinking “he seems like a nice guy I guess”, not “wow I want that guy to bend me over this bar and fuck my brains out”.
This guy will get results, because he’s basically playing the numbers game and he sticks in there as long as he can, but most of the numbers he gets will either be flakes, or be girls who expect him to take her on a date because they think “well he’s not sexy but maybe he can be my provider beta male while I fuck someone better”, or the girls just give them the number out of social pressure or not wanting to be rude or being drunk etc.
I would put a solid 90% of the guys that approach girls on any given night at the bar in this category.
Last but not least we have:
4) pro-active, verbose (high-energy, alpha)
his is your Russel Brands, your John Mayers, your Robert Downey Jr’s, etc. The key to notice is that, just like the “pro-active, laconic” type, this type also forces their environment to react to them, puts everyone on their heels trying to catch their balance, etc.
Another key feature of this type, which is where Buena’s experiment was off-track, is that this type self-amuses. Everything they do is for their own amusement. They like to fuck with people, use innuendo and sarcasm and go off on little tangents, they talk about whatever’s on their mind, and don’t care whether the girl stays or goes because they’re having fun. This is kind of the opposite of the “pro-active, laconic” type in that this type doesn’t really care about “getting to know” the girl and asking her deep questions about herself…he’s getting to know the girl by seeing how she reacts to him shaking up her world.
Also a lot of these guys use dead-pan. They rattle off some stuff in that tone of voice and with that straight-face where the girl has to think “wait, is he serious?” and basically he’s forcing her to think, which is forcing her to react to him, instead of reacting to her. They tend to have very strong frame-control too, and suck the people around them into their frame.
And finally, because they’re pro-active, they’re always pushing forward…usually to sex, but also just to whatever their goals are (and their goal is often just to shake people up because they know that’ll translate to attraction).
What do you do if you realize upon reading this that you’re stuck in category 3 and you’re tired of asexual interactions and flakey numbers and girls who like you but don’t want to FUCK you, and you want to transition to category 4? The keys are in using breaking-rapport tonality, self-amusing, making statements instead of asking questions, expressing yourself and who you are instead of asking her questions about who she wants or if she approves of things, total outcome independence, etc. Say controversial things unapologetically. Force her, and the people around you, to react to you. Be the center of attention and embrace it. Understand that other guys watching wish they were taking action like you, and girls watching wish that they were being allowed to get swept up in your energy the way the person you’re talking to is. Take improv classes and learn to riff off what people say and redirect the flow of the conversation. Understand that you’re giving value just by being you, and that it’s okay if some people don’t like you. Stick by your opinions, never change your view or your behavior/actions to supplicate to a girl. Completely entertain yourself when you’re out…even if you make an ass out of yourself or say something stupid, act as if it was the smartest awesomest thing in the world and other people will fall into that frame.
And most importantly: LEAD/PUSH THE INTERACTION SOMEWHERE, like to you sticking your dick in her, not to “a nice conversation” or “a pretty solid number”. Get up in her space and escalate as you talk, drop innuendo, add in kino, be an unstoppable force that has the crowd around you going “holy shit look at that guy go!” and has the girls around you telling your target “omg kiss him already!!!”
So there it is. Hopefully this clears up some discussion. Happy Halloween. Get out there and have some fun, every girls’ ASD is on holiday and it’s the sluttiest time of the year. No going for gay phone numbers, go all or nothing for the makeout and Same Night Lays. Escalate hard and fast, they aren’t putting on those slutty outfits to NOT get some dick. Be pro-active, whether you’re laconic or verbose.
On What Makes Naturals Good
Part of what makes Naturals good is that they’re really attuned to these little windows of opportunity and they’ve had success with women for so much of their lives that they instinctively pounce on these windows instantly, whereas guys like us have to learn to watch for them…and beta AFC guys don’t even notice the windows are opening or talk themselves out of it (“nahh no way she could be into me, she probably was just being polite” lol). This is part of why we err on the side of “assume attraction” instead of “assume no attraction”…often, especially at the start, there are actually open windows in the interaction that you don’t even realize are there, so it’s better to be erring on the side of trying to jump through the windows.
On Setting The Mood for your Group of Buddies
I generally try to make sure my whole group feels good and awesome and confident when we go out because I want my buddies to feel like the shit the way I do so we all kill it as a group and all have a blast…so ya, I could be like “Dude, that girl was NASTY!! lol” and tool him in front of everyone, but then what kind of vibe are we going out with? Depression, hostility, insecurity, competitiveness, etc. That’s no fun.
On Amping Up Your State
I’m sure I’ve mentioned it before but like, you have to program your brain with good shit. Society is programming you with garbage, from music to movies etc it’s all Blue Pill mindset shit, songs about chasing The One and missing a girl and movies where guys are fighting over some average chick and trying to woo her with flowers, newspapers full of dumbed down stories and blogs full of shock stories and nightly newscasts about all the worst shit happening in society because that’s what people tune in to hear about (the news is designed to send you on an emotional rollercoaster, bunch of negative stories and then aww the local puppy shelter held a bake sale look at the cute puppy, rinse repeat).
Program your brain. Control the content you consume and pick content that puts you in a good state and keeps you in positive mindsets. I still listen to angsty weepy music and I still watch sad/deep movies, but I watch them on like, a Sunday or Monday where I’m not going out socializing lol Once Wednesday hits it’s all positive and all awesomeness. I play RSD vids all the time that’s why I know which vids to link when subjects come up, because the content in them is a thousand times better than some depressing weepy emo rant by some negative vblogger that’s going viral and everyone else is consuming.
When I go out solo I spent a few hours before the bar just blasting and singing along to good music as I shower up, compliment myself in the mirror affirmation-style about how awesome I am, plaster a fake smile on my face (change your physiology and all that, the smile eventually becomes real), visualize opening sets successfully, watch funny shit on YouTube, I’ll watch a few episodes of Keys to the VIP or some pickup infield etc so when I head out I’m feeling good and social. It doesn’t just magically HAPPEN…it’s like the gym, most people don’t WANT to go to the gym when they wake up, but they find ways to get themselves there because they made a commitment and once they get there with their headphones on etc they enjoy it but like most people don’t come home from an 8 hour shift and lay around for a few hours lethargically staring at a TV screen zoning out like a zombie till 8pm and then go “I WANNA GO SOCIALIZE WITH STRANGERS ALL BY MYSELF IN A HIGH-ENERGY ENVIRONMENT WOOO!!!” But you made a commitment so you take pro-active steps to get yourself out of a negative zombie introvert mode and into a social positive extrovert mode. It’s on YOU to do that.
I had to do it Saturday, wing was out of town so I had to hit a kiddie nightclub solo. Was so close to bailing but I try to never miss Fri & Sat (I’ve had years where I’ve literally only missed a couple of them) unless like, I’m on the verge of death ill and even THEN I’ll pop some meds and dristan and get out there. This Saturday I could’ve just gone back to sleep. No one would have known. I could have even told people I went out and just made a Field Report up for my buddies, no one would ever find out my little secret. It would be soooo easy, I’m soooo tired and underslept and this bed is sooooo comfy and I can’t visualize anything but failure all I picture is me being low-energy tired and standing around in a corner all night I might as well not go no one is going to want to interact with that guy and I can’t see myself turning this around in just a few hours ughhhh…
But I made a commitment. So I roll out of bed, flip on the lights, put music on and start my process. Had one of my best nights in a long time, making out with a hot blonde, solid number from another girl, opened a bunch of other chicks, befriended random dudes, made friends with a bartender, went along on an adventure to an epic afterparty full of strangers and hooked up. Could never have imagined that was going to happen when I was laying there like a zombie thinking about bailing.
Like the PUA saying goes: “I’ve never regretted a night out, but I always regret staying in.”
Don’t let society program your brain, it wants you docile and retarded and lethargic and self-doubting so you stay in line. Society’s programming is how you GOT here in the first place. Take pro-active steps to program it with good healthy positive shit. Save the zombie mode for lazy days.
(when I go out with buddies I’ll sometimes go out with lower energy or a zombie state because I know I can ride their energy a bit, but if it’s a solo night or we’re hitting a high-energy venue I pump my state for it because why wouldn’t you do your stretches before the big game? Common sense)
On Being the Center of Attention
Don’t be afraid to be the center of attention…learn to thrive on it and enjoy it. We’re taught by society not to draw attention to ourselves and disrupt everyone’s lives…but someone who’s good will revel in creating chaos and having the whole room mind-fucked by what he’s doing.
On What Short Guys Should Do
For a short guy, it’s better for you to be approaching groups with hot girls in them, because you get a chance to demonstrate your value, THEN you can zero in on a target and escalate from there. Being short, you’re approaching with a deficit of value in their stereotypical view of the world, so if you go direct you don’t get a chance to demonstrate how awesome you are…but when you jump into the gladiator ring and go head to head with some lions (aka shit-tests, her bitchy friends, etc.) and come out victorious, NOW you have high-value.
Imagine if, at this point, a hot shooter girl you always flirt with, comes over and grabs you and flirts with you. What would THAT do to the dynamics of this group where you’ve won them over and shown enough value for the 7 and 7.5 to approve of you and you know the 7 is a little bit interested (there’s a spark there, as evidenced by her throwing you a sword earlier, and her asking your name before she goes later)? Then imagine your buddy brings you a beer, because you’re so pimp that your buddies supplicate to you? Then imagine the manager of the bar goes “Scray!! What’s up man! Hey girls, watch out for this guy, he’s trouble! ” and buys the table a round of shots.
Think your height would matter a single fuck at that point? This is the kind of game you’re going to be working toward over the next few years of your life. Future Scray will be doing shit you can’t even imagine would be possible for him to do right now.
… Honestly as a short guy I would avoid talking about height related topics at all unless she brings it up. Once you set the frame that you view the world through height, like it’s something that’s relevant to you, she’s going to view the world that way too because what you feel, she feels.
On How to Obliterate a Cock-blocking Bitch Shield
If you watch the last set that Cajun opens on his Keys to the VIP appearance (hit Youtube up), you’ll notice he turns around the bitchiest girl in the set because he says to the friends “I like your friend, you know why? Because she’s the only one who gave me shit.” and basically compliments her on having attitude etc. From there the bitch shield is obliterated and she becomes a sweet purring little kitten.
On Handling Shit-Tests
Thing is, no one shit-tests the quiet shy Nice Guy with no identity who stands in a corner trying to blend into the background while his buddies are approaching girls. He’s insignificant. When you start getting shit-tested, that means you’re popping up on people’s radar. So get used to it lol.
… I’d rather a girl shit-tests me so I can pass those tests and build attraction fast, than just think I’m a “nice guy” and not test me at all and we get stuck in that gay friend zone vibe lol
… If an 18yo girl at the bar says “I hate you”, it hurts. If your 5 year old neice says “I hate you” and pouts it’s cute and you go “lol awww” and are completely unphased by it. So this option is basically treating her like she’s your 5yo neice or little sister, like what she tried to burn you with was silly and she just amuses you trying to give you shit. This shows a lot of confidence and it passes the shit-tests and builds attraction (often causing more shit-tests until she finally decides “okay this guy is solid, I can’t get to him……so I LIKE him!”) lol
On How to Handle another Man trying to Disrupt Your Group Approach and be The Alhpa Male of the Group (AMOG)
This is how I handle AMOGs a lot of the time if they’re dicks to me. I’ll rally the group/crowd up against them, so I know they’re feeling massive social pressure, and as soon as I see them pass that point where they crack and consciously realize “o shit everyone thinks I’m the asshole here”, I’ll press on them a little harder and just give it a twist thinking like “fuck you for being a dick…see this feeling? I control this, this is a direct consequence of you being a dick to me…memorize this pain, asshole.”, and then I’ll just relieve allllllll that pressure and go “lol it’s cool man, we’ve all been drinking and I totally was kind of creepy when I came up anyway lol You gotta’ protect your girls from the bar creepers, right? You’d be a shitty friend if you DIDN’T give a random strange dude shit for talking to them. So anyway–(segue into resuming the sarge)”
He’ll take that olive branch because he gets to stop feeling all that social pressure, and now you’re bros.
This is REALLY powerful. You would be surprised how many people, guys, girls, hot girls, tough MMA type guys, etc. will cave to social pressure and how much power you have when you can consciously wield that social pressure. It’s fascinating.
… Generally with AMOGs, try to get into the mindset that everything is a compliment, even if it’s logically probably not…VS the opposite mindset where everything is an insult/AMOG-attempt, even if it’s logically probably not. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll “win” or get the girl or win over the group or whatever, but it’s a healthier mindset because a lot of times when people tease you but see that you laugh it off and they can’t shake you, they respect you for it and then legitimately warm up to you.
On If You Don’t Like Dancing
If you don’t LOVE dancing, like you wouldn’t go to a club JUST to dance, then if you’ve got heavy kino with a girl and it’s later in the night and the dance floor is crowded enough that you can isolate her from her friends a bit and the attraction is there that you feel like you can escalate to sexy grinding and become a “couple” for the rest of the night afterward, cool, go dance with her. But if it’s anything less than that, you’re just shooting yourself in the foot and killing attraction while you dance 2 feet away from her feeling insecure and you’re all in a circle facing eachother friend-zone style.
At least if you just vanish, you’re still a little mysterious and she can wonder what dancing with you would be like.
I actually sometimes go “Okay ya let’s go” and let everyone else walk in front of me to the dance floor and then before I get to the floor I just veer off and go somewhere else and talk to other people or get a drink or go to the bathroom etc. and don’t go onto the dance floor to join them at all lol It makes the girl go “wait what? Where did YaReally go??” and it’s not much but hey, she’s thinking about me and it gives her a reason to re-open me when she sees me later (“hey how come you didn’t come dance??”) where I might be able to build some more attraction and escalate and dance with her on my own terms if I want to dance.
Set the playing field that benefits YOU, don’t let other people lead you into a shitty field. You wouldn’t fight a war on the other army’s home turf if you had the option of fighting it on yours.
On Destroying the I’ve Got A Boyfriend Anti Slut Defense
Tell her you have a girlfriend. Then it’s okay for her to cheat on her boyfriend because you’re cheating on your girlfriend and don’t feel bad about it, so you aren’t judging her and she won’t feel bad about cheating on her boyfriend. She’ll also know that you won’t get clingy and fuck her relationship up with her boyfriend because you already have a girlfriend, so you’re automatically 100% in the “just casual sex” relationship zone.
I’ve had a framed photograph of my GF on my nightstand for almost a year now and it’s actually helped me lay taken girls (“ya, I’m taken too, but we’re out of the honeymoon stage and our sex life has kind of died down so she knows that I play around on my own time because we both know it’s natural to eventually want to explore sex with other people, you know what I mean?”) and set up a casual fuckbuddy frame (“sorry, no dates, I already have a girlfriend and I love her, but god you turn me on, we should do this again sometime”)…which I’m sure is the opposite effect of what she expected giving me the photograph would do lol
As soon as a girl tells me she has a boyfriend I mention being in an open relationship. The girl is always cheating because she doesn’t have an open relationship, but she feels free to cheat with me because she knows I won’t judge her.
I’ve actually told a couple girls “If you break up with your BF, you will never hear from me again.” because I don’t want them to break up with their BF thinking they’re going to seriously date me (it happens and it fucks the dynamic up and creates the “Ultimatum” where I have to either date her or she leaves).
… If she doesn’t harp on having one, ie – she mentions him once and then pretty much never again (until you’re closer to sex), she’s just doing it because of her ASD…she’s dissolving herself of responsibility for what happens because hey, she was a good girl, she SAID she had a BF, anything that happens is your fault not hers. So she has to mention him and then she’s free to fuck you.
But like I say, she’ll probably mention him again closer to sex, or during rapport, but generally she won’t talk about him in a positive light, it’ll be more like “ya my bf and I had a fight last week, I think he’s cheating on me” or “we’re going thru a rocky period” etc. that’s all ASD talking, alleviating her guilt for what’s about to happen.
In that situ, use this:
http://www.bristollair.com/2011/outer-game/pua-techniques/boyfriend-destroyer/ (Yeah this is not his stuff, but he brought it to my attention)
On Why Game beats Nice Clothes/Money
“(to the girl as suit-man walks or stands nearby) wow check out that guy’s suit, that’s fucking pimp. He looks like James Bond. I feel so underdressed in this T-Shirt. You should fuck him, no guy spends that much money on a suit unless he’s got a huge cock under it. I’m just saying, mine is tiny, you would be so disappointed in it. Hey, I saw that, you’re looking at my crotch. (grab her in close, put her hands around my shoulders, my hands around her hips) Fucking pervert, why are you so obsessed with my crotch? I’m totally not putting out tonight you know, you’re not even my type (cheeky grin), I think you’re hideous. (makeout)”
Or in situs where the guy is in set or enters my set or tried pouncing on my girl while I was taking a piss:
“(to the guy) wow that’s an awesome suit man, you look like fucking James Bond. (to the girl) this guy is awesome, you’re lucky your boyfriend dresses up when you guys go out, my ex never dressed up. Oh? He’s not your boyfriend? Oh shit sorry, awkward lol well he fuckin SHOULD be. The man has a SUIT, god. What more could you want? If you don’t date him you’re gonna be stuck with the rest of us ugly poor fuckers. Look at me I’m in a fuckin t-shirt. (side-step, turn her away from the suit guy) I gotta get a suit, what do you think, would I look hot in a suit? Ya? God, why are you so SHALLOW. You’re supposed to love me for my personality, not my ridiculously handsome good looks. I hate you, you shallow shallow bitch. Aww no, I’m kidding, I love you. Can you love me even in my t-shirt? (cut the space and get closer, put her arms up around my shoulders and mine at her waist). Because it seems like you love me already. I’m just saying. (knowingly cheesy) Don’t hold back your feelings, this is destiny. (get closer). But don’t think I’m going to kiss you, you’re not my type, being so shallow and all. I only like sweet (kiss) innocent (kiss) girls who (makeout)…what was I saying again?”
Don’t waste $1000 on a suit till you have game lol
Marriage is a legally binding contract that takes away every ability a man has to express his alpha qualities. In this day and age it is specifically designed to force a guy into a beta role that his woman will, ultimately, lose attraction for.
The nuance most guys don’t understand is that Hypergamy isn’t just about “who’s the best looking, richest, most alpha badass James Bond she thinks she can get”, it’s “who’s giving her the emotions she needs”. He IS better than before because even though he hasn’t changed in terms of external attributes, his behavior of IDGAF is now giving her the emotional rollercoaster she’s needed (but society has socially conditioned men to not provide or to feel ashamed/apologetic for providing).
So Hypergamy does apply, but you have to be looking at the right channels of “what is high value to a woman”? And when you just look through society’s channels (looks, money, etc) it doesn’t make sense that a chick dating some rich good-looking guy would fuck the scrubby badboy poolboy who makes her tingle. But when you understand her rich good-looking husband acts is too agreeable or in scarcity and the poolboy teases her or even picks fights with her and smooths them over etc, it makes perfect sense via Hypergamy, because that poolboy is providing her REAL value.
Again this is why I stress guys don’t get caught up in looks, money, etc. because it can put them on a wrong path where they think “I don’t get it, I’m losing attraction, maybe I need BETTER looks and MORE money since those are attractive!!”
When what women ACTUALLY value are the emotions you make them FEEL, and they want to feel a full RANGE of emotions (again no one goes to a movie where there’s no conflict, we pay money to go see horror flicks and shit, no one would read 50 Shades of Grey if the guy was a Nice Guy instead of a tortured bad boy, the entire basis of Twilight is “if we get together I’ll end up killing you” lol).
On Crazy Bitches
What your Blue Pill psychiatrist doesn’t get is that she doesn’t WANT TO GET BETTER. What she’s doing is WORKING. It’s KEEPING YOU AROUND. It’s KEEPING YOU ADDICTED TO HER.
And she ENJOYS IT. She WANTS TO FEEL BAD EMOTIONS AS WELL AS GOOD EMOTIONS. That’s why we pay money for horror movies, that’s why girls watch soap operas and read Twilight and shit. BAD EMOTIONS ARE GOOD EMOTIONS TO HER BECAUSE *******ANYTHING******* THAT ISN’T A DULL FLATLINE OF EMOTION MAKES HER FEEL *****ALIVE*****.
That’s why they cheat on the predictable provider guy who provides them a flatline of emotion even if that flatline is generally positive…they go fuck their lives up and cause themselves MASSIVE DRAMA because they want to feel ANYTHING, good or bad.
On Gaming During Halloween
Halloween is coming up, literally THE sluttiest time of the year with not just NO consequence for girls to be slutty but MASSIVE SOCIAL PRESSURE to BE slutty, and you can open EVERY chick with the EASIEST opener in the WORLD built into the holiday: “Hey, I like your costume” (or in my case “lol wtf are YOU supposed to be?” lol)
And for a month afterward you can ask what they were for Halloween too. But don’t just ask, QUALIFY THEM on it.
Instead of “So what is/was your Halloween costume? Oh, that’s a cool idea!” bla bla, apply Julien’s “boring conversation” stuff (Julien free PIMP vids on YouTube) to add authoritative/qualifying tonalities to it.
“What’s your costume going to be.” (breaking rapport tonality, like it’s a challenge, like you’ll walk away if she says something dumb)
“I’m going to be a (whatever)!”
“No. That’s terrible.”
“What omg!! What’s wrong with (whatever)??”
“Not slutty enough.”
“Well it has a short skirt and (bla bla qualifying)”
Take the conversation sexual, act as if it’s retarded to you that a girl wouldn’t dress up sexy for Halloween like you can’t even comprehend the existence of a girl who’s shy on Halloween etc (because hot girls dress sexy to show it off on Halloween, if you’re the kind of guy who’s around hot girls a lot that’s the mentality you would have…imagine a girl telling Dan Bilzerian she’s going to dress as a truck driver for Halloween, how would he react given the lifestyle he lives in?)
You can add in stuff like telling her what her costume SHOULD be (if she’s smokin hot, tell her she should dress as a truck driver or something unattractive implying that she’s ugly, if she’s shy bring out her sexual side describing sexy costumes and qualify her body etc), and disqualifying her entirely (freezeout, backturn, walk away, just noticeably show less interest, etc) until she wins you back etc.
This year Halloween falls on a Monday so the hotties will be costumed up Fri, Sat, Sun, and Mon. That’s 4 nights in a row of slutty costumes and girls letting their sexual sides out consequence-free.
Literally EVERY guy here, I don’t care who you are or what your situation is (even the married OMGs, ’cause if you expect your advice to carry weight to the Young Single Guys then you should be infield at LEAST during the easiest weekend of the entire year directly applying red pill shit on <25yo 8+/10s), should be in a nightclub and saying at LEAST that opener (ideally have a routine stack where you guess her costume and have her turn around for you to check her out and think about how you’re going to get up in her space and laser…have routines planned for when she asks you about your costume or lack of costume, not just one-liners but actual stacks that turn her asking that into you escalating sexually etc) to the top 20 hottest girls they see each night, regardless of whether those girls are with guys dressed in their “show off my abs” 300 Gladiator costumes or not, for at LEAST one of those 4 nights, but ideally all 4 nights in a row.
Not even to actually GET those girls (OMGs don’t have to cheat on their wives lol), but just to see some of this “crazy shit” I talk about in action.
More importantly than the OMGs though: this goes quadruple for the Young Single Guys sarging because this is their annual chance to push their comfort zone and gain reference experiences under EXTREMELY IDEAL circumstances with odds stacked MASSIVELY in favor of those 9s and 10s that might normally have bitch-shields up, being receptive as fuck to engaging with strangers since they’re in full attention-whoring mode. Even if you’re ugly or old just say “my costume is a creepy old man who hangs out in bars hitting on 21 year olds, under this I’m actually a 21yo 6″4″ jock with a 6-pack” lol
Just like you should normally be flirting with hot bartenders and waitresses because they’re PAID to be receptive to you and that builds reference experiences in your head of “I AM attractive to hot girls, that bartender loved me she stayed and kept asking questions way longer than she had to and we lasered!!”, and you should always engage birthday/engagement parties because they’re going to be receptive to you and that builds “I can handle groups of girls, girls love me! Also I’m learning group theory and seeing all these things Mystery and YaReally talk about!”, this is like EVERY SMOKESHOW HOTTEST GIRL IN THE ENTIRE CITY being an easy reference experience for you to collect.
You can still take home the slutty nurse 6 that’s been giving you the eye all night or whatever at the end of the night, I won’t judge ya, but EVERY DUDE ON THIS SITE should be out at least one of those 4 nights (ideally all of them) engaging with THE hottest girls they see all night long.
If it’s November 1st and all you’ve opened over the last 4 days are at BEST 6s and 7s and you SAW hotter than that (and we KNOW you did…except maybe Hank lol), then Real Talk: you need to do some serious thinking about how bad you actually want this part of your life handled and how bad you ACTUALLY want LEGITIMATELY HOT 8+/10 girls in your life instead of just average girls.
And for extra challenge, social pressure, and shit-tests: try doing this all without wearing a costume yourself…and mack the costumed chicks instead of the ones that aren’t costumed up which is what your brain will try to do to avoid the social pressure of not being dressed up (“this girl isn’t dressed up so WHEW we have a commonality and I don’t have to fear the social pressure of risking her thinking I’m lame for not dressing up”).
I expect to see a fuckload of “I approached actual 9s and 10s holy shit!!” FRs around here from Halloween weekend lol I don’t care if you even fuck them or not, just get into interactions with them. APPLY all this shit you’ve been reading about. Go UP against the 300 Gladiator AMOGs for the 10s and actually USE what you’ve been learning all year (DHV, tease, step to the side so she’s not facing him, push, pull, merge the set, use another girl to make her jealous, etc etc).
You HAVE the knowledge, you’ve been reading it all year, or for multiple years, and Halloween is THE easiest environment to apply it (every city becomes an overall Vegas mindset for the weekend). Every guy here HAS the knowledge to PULL AND FUCK <25yo 8+/10s who have thousands of orbiters and celebs and rich dudes and shit chasing them. Drag your ass out for at LEAST one of those nights, but ideally man up and do all 4 nights and try to push every set to an actual pull (“What are you doing later?”, see Julien’s free clips on YouTube about asking determining her logistics)
Choose nightclubs over house parties because house parties have limited options and a bunch of orbiter/AMOG dynamics to deal with, and choose nightclubs over bars because they’ll have more room and people are standing/walking around and you want quantity so that you can rack up as much experience engaging smokeshow hotties as possible (VS a pub down the street that might have one solid 9 if you’re lucky and she’ll be there in a big group sitting down at a booth table in a corner).
And on Halloween it’s totally fine to be out solo, no one gives a shit, they just assume your friends are drunk somewhere else (say your buddy went home with a slutty nurse) so don’t let not having friends or some group costume shit be an excuse to not go out.
This is that “push your comfort zone” shit I talk about. You can go out every night for a year straight and not make any real progress if you aren’t actually pushing your comfort zone out there…but spend ONE weekend getting up in the space of 9s and 10s and actually interacting with them on the night they’re most receptive, and you’ll do a fuckload of wonder for your internals and sense of entitlement. Don’t become another Manosphere chode that spends 10 years banging average girls and becomes bitter about the game when he’s really just secretly resenting himself for not stepping up to the smokeshows.
Every single dude trying to learn pickup should come out of Halloween with a boost to his internals every single year. That adds up.
On Not Relying on Your Externals
On Penis Size:
First we’re going to toss out self-surveys by women of what they want, because women are retarded and think they want flowers and nice guys too…again this goes back to “WE ALWAYS IGNORE WHAT WOMEN SAY ABOUT WHAT TURNS THEM ON…EXCEPT WHEN IT ALIGNS WITH OUR ALREADY DEEPLY ENTRENCHED LIMITING BELIEFS, *THEN* WE TAKE WHAT THEY SAY AT FACE VALUE!!!!” You can’t pick and choose when to listen to women’s self-surveys because that’s EXACTLY what the idiot showing up with a dozen roses and asking “so where would YOU like to eat tonight?” and asking her if it’s okay to kiss her is doing when he cherry-picks the self-survey shit that aligns with his retarded beliefs.
On top of that when it comes to sex most women haven’t even HAD good sex. Because most guys are shit in bed. Which again comes down to the same thing with muscles and money: if you are boring as fuck, then yes, those things will help you because you’re giving her nothing else to base her opinion on and she has to resort to those but if you would step up and make emotional impacts on women and quit being a fucking dialtone of mundane flatline emotions (or very slowly raising emotions, or only positive emotions never any negative ones) she wouldn’t give a shit whether your belt matches your custom leather shoes or your dick is an extra inch or not. The guys who are hung up on that shit I can almost GUARANTEE are running fucking weak game and don’t realize it because it might still be better than the average guy’s game.
Look at any of those Julien infield clips in PIMP where he has girls falling over themselves emotionally reacting to him, do you think any of them give a shit what size his dick is or what his shoes look like or that he has man-boobs? They want to fuck him because he’s creating emotional impact and if you’re still hung up on this retarded stuff it’s because your game doesn’t have anywhere near the emotional impact that Julien’s game has and you aren’t getting the reactions that Julien gets that make that shit irrelevant…that shouldn’t be an indicator that you should go get better shoes or lift more weight or try to stretch your dick out, that’s an indicator that you should GO OUT IN THE FUCKING FIELD MORE AND WORK ON YOUR FUCKING GAME lol
…but it’s a LOT easier to let that fear of the field take over and spend your Friday night at the gym or earning money or shopping for shoes or doing dick exercises or climbing mountains or doing MMA or ANY OTHER FUCKING THING UNDER THE SUN TO AVOID PUTTING YOUR BALLS ON THE LINE GOING UP TO PRETTY GIRLS AND SAYING HELLO and developing your game to where you understand what I’m saying and why the RSD instructors aren’t all jacked 6’8″ guys in custom-fitted suits with 12″ dicks.
But today instead of just telling you guys how retarded this conversation is, I’m going to walk you through logical thought processes so that you can understand why what you’re saying is silly. God, where to begin…let’s start simple and build our way up:
1) Do you guys think that all women have giant 24″ BBC monster dildos in their closets? And that sex toy stores don’t sell smaller dildos? Or that only small women are buying small dildos and every chick is buying the dildo that stretches her out the most (and even THEN that just brings us to point number 3 down below). If all women wanted was to just be rammed full then basic market economics 101 would result in stores being stocked with giant fist-shaped dildos and nothing smaller but there are a TON of smaller toys and if you look through a chick’s sex toy drawer she might have a 24″ dildo but generally a chick who has that also has a bunch of smaller ones because she doesn’t just want to shove fists up her pussy every time she’s horny. Most girls have a bunch of toys that just fit “nicely” along with a huge one for the now and then where they want to get rammed full but a lot of them don’t even have one of those.
2) Do you guys think that lesbians are all stockpiling 50″ strap-ons and every time they fuck it’s just railing eachother with huge strap-ons and that’s how they have orgasms? Is all the lesbian porn out there, homemade or otherwise, just lesbians strapping up the biggest rubber cock they can find and plowing eachother with them? Other types of orgasms, other spots in the pussy, other sensations and feelings, the mental aspects the build-up the foreplay the teasing, none of that matters, it just comes down to “look did she shove a 13″ dildo in me or a 12″ because if it was only 12″ I’m OUTTA HERE TILL SHE BUYS A BIGGER ONE!!!”
3) Do you think a girl getting her pussy stretched out to oblivion can even handle a round two of that without some recovery time? Do you lift your max weight at the gym 3x a day with no time for your body to recover? And then she’s going to want to get fist-sized dick railing her the next morning and later that night again? For some girls, ya the pain is probably a turn-on and shit, but like, we’re still talking about the human body here, it needs recovery time that isn’t necessarily pleasant when shit gets stretched all over the place. Those chicks in porn who take a huge 12″ cock up their ass spent the night before and all day leading up to the shoot with various buttplugs up their ass starting from their smallest to their largest so that on the shoot the guy can just ram his huge cock in there. They aren’t just taking a girl off the street and jamming fists in her holes. And if you find a girl who, by default with no stretching or anything leading up to it, can just take a two-fist huge dildo up her holes, there are other concerns you should probably be more focused on lol
4) Do you guys think every chick’s pussy is the same? Like it’s some one size fits all shit? Do you think the height, weight, petiteness, etc of a chick has any relevance to how loose or tight her pussy is? Because if you do, you have more fucking to do. There are fatties with pussies you can barely get a finger into and petite chicks you can shove a fist into. So it doesn’t even make SENSE that “bigger is better” in the same way it wouldn’t make sense to say “for men blonder is better” when tons of men don’t even like blondes or like brunettes or redheads more, and just like it wouldn’t make sense to say “bigger tits are better” when tons of guys don’t even give a shit about tits or are more into asses etc.
But we’ll ignore logic because hey, dick size hits home for guys, it’s a big insecurity society has conditioned everyone to have. I mean, let’s just run with this lack of logic and serve a small asian child the same 50oz steak we’d feed a linebacker, ’cause hey bigger is better, why factor in anything like how tight the chick’s pussy is and how a chick with a small tight pussy is going to find that 3.5″ dick guy just right, and that small tight pussy could be on some 6’2″ blonde model because body type doesn’t correlate to pussy size just like there are small dudes with big dicks and tall dudes with little dicks. This is basic fucking logic.
5) Google Cytheria. I’ll wait. Enjoy that? Are you making 95% of the chicks you shove your dick in shoot waterfalls that literally jet out and drench both of you when you’re thrusting your dick in there? Because odds are you aren’t…if you are, it’s probably just with one or two of your girls who have a natural ability for it and not the consistent majority of them and overall it’s probably inconsistent (because that’s how the mechanics of what’s happening work). Watch Squirting 101 and go out and make a ton of chick’s squirt with the finger technique the dude explains in the video. It’s a hooking upward pulling motion on the upper-front of the pussy aka the g-spot. Unless your dick is shaped like an umbrella handle and you’re yanking it straight upward instead of thrusting it in and out of her, it doesn’t matter if your dick is 5″ or 10″ it’s probably not hitting the g-spot in the way that leads to insane squirting orgasms. There’s a chance you might rub against it or hit it, depending on the shape of her pussy and the angle your dick bends at and the position you’re fucking her in, but with just my fingers, doing what the guy is explaining in Squirting 101 I can make like 95% of the chicks I’m with squirt to an extent that blows their mind and leaves them twitching and useless and unable to form words as their legs quiver while we cuddle after, along with an understanding how chick’s orgasms/bodies/minds function to make that shit consistently easy to do to them regardless of their vagina size or my dick size etc because it’s just fingers.
My point with this one is that there are different types of orgasms, not just P in V and you should know how to make her have all those other types of orgasms. If your mentality is “girls need to be railed hard with a huge dick to have an orgasm”, like, you have a lot of learning about getting chicks off to do lol G-Spot, Deep-Spot, A-Spot, Clitoral, figuring out her personal erogenous zones and fantasies and using that shit to get her to cum without even touching her pussy, like, you should be able to do this stuff and understand how their bodies work for that shit if you’re going to go out seducing a bunch of chicks. You don’t show up to a baseball game only knowing how to swing a bat. Swinging a bat is a great skill and useful to win the game, but there’s more to the fucking game than that lol
I get that the older guys didn’t have the type of porn we have now so like, back in their day just fucking a girl missionary was basically what sex was, but like, educate yourself. Anyone who says “oh porn is all fake” is an idiot who hasn’t looked at porn in the last 10 years where tons of it is real people putting up their own homemade shit with tons of real orgasms achieved through tons of different ways. You should be studying that shit and learning from it and reading books and PDFs and forums and shit about getting girls off. You should have a whole fucking arsenal of moves in bed. Watch a bunch of lesbian porn and don’t fast-forward to the orgasm part, watch the whole boring slow build-up, that boring slow build-up isn’t just filling time, that shit is what builds up the orgasm payoff.
The first time I hook up with a girl I often don’t even bother trying to P in V her because I will have her screaming and gushing like Cytherea till she can’t move and her pussy can’t take anymore, with just my tongue and fingers, and because most guys suck at sex half the time she’s laying there going “omg what did you DO to me???” because she’s never had a squriting/g-spot orgasm, so I know THAT’s going to be a bigger novelty than just getting railed, and that’s going to have her coming back for more because she knows she can’t get that from other guys. I could literally be dickless, or have a little one-inch nubbin down there or not take off my pants and it wouldn’t matter because I’m doing all this other shit.
6) Too big hurts, there’s a spot I can’t remember the name of but it’s like the back wall of the pussy where if you ram into that it hurts like a bitch. Some girls who get off on actual pain will like that it hurts but those are the pain-fetish chicks which are kind of a niche market, for most girls it’s an instant “holy fuck stop ouch ouch ouch”, just like some dudes get off on girls kicking them in the balls but for most of us it’s a “holy fuck stop ouch ouch ouch” level of pain.
7) It’s a helluva lot easier to convince a girl to do anal if you don’t have a huge dick lol “you won’t even notice it” I have a 5’2″ buddy who’s got a small dick and every girl he’s been with has taken it up the bum because it’s not as daunting as a monster cock. I’ve had a few girls where they wanted to do anal but they were too petite and we couldn’t get my dick in and we were both disappointed that we weren’t able to do it (without a ton of building-up and slow stretching her ass and all that, not real convenient for a same-night lay though)
8) Ever tried throat-fucking a petite girl? It’s not even an option if she can’t get her mouth around your dick easily, let alone getting her teeth out of the way. A lot of girls LOVE to get roughly deep-throated, to where they’re gagging and choking and the back of their throat hurts the next day, it’s a huge submissive thing for their guy to just grab their head and throat-fuck them. Too big a dick and there are things you’re not able to do in bed.
9) Let’s say dick size DOES matter. Now, I don’t know how you guys do pickup, but my pickups generally don’t involve whipping out my dick and a tape measure in the middle of the bar while she’s talking about how she loves her career in marketing. Like how do you guys visualize that she would even KNOW what your dick size is before you whip it out when you’re both about to actually fuck?? A girl doesn’t see my dick size or shape or my body or the actual flabbiness of my man boobs or the hair on my back or any other random insecurity I could come up with, until she’s so turned on that we are about to fuck. If I’m seducing her properly, she’s so turned on that whether I have an extra inch down there or a 6-pack or live in a nice mansion etc etc none of that shit will matter. I might put her hand on my cock thru my pants as part of the seduction process but like, it’s going to just be for a second to make her curious I’m not going to have it on there and hand her a tape measure lol
Would she, on a self-survey, SAY she’d like a guy with a huge dick? Sure. Would she also say she’d like to fuck in a nice mansion bedroom with 5-star hotel cleanliness? Sure. But did the girls my buddy and I picked up around New Years fuck him in his dirty filthy bathroom and me on his shitty old futon? Yup. And are both of them texting us to hook up again? Yup. BUT TEH SELF-SURVEYSSss!!1 Are you going to say you want a girl with huge tits and a tiny waist and perfect ass and gorgeous face with perfect facial features and perfect personality traits etc on a self-survey? Sure. How many of you not only FUCK girls who AREN’T like that, but ENJOY fucking them and even MARRIED them? Fuck self-surveys lol
When a girl is turned on, she’ll fuck whatever dick is in front of her. If she laughs you out of the room for your tiny 3″ dick it’s not because of your dick it’s because you suck ass at seduction and didn’t have her turned on to the point where she doesn’t care about that and/or you were subcommunicating being self-conscious about it and you should be studying how to get her off better and embracing your “flaw” the same way you’d embrace being “too old for her” etc. Make her squirt a few times before you even pull your dick out if you’re that concerned.
It’s like this retarded boogeyman “she’s just gonna KNOW I have a little dick oh no!!!!” Yes if you’re banging social circle girls and you have a huge dick it might spread around and there will be girls curious to check it out. But that’s just passive game, it’s the same as the guys who worry about whether their belt matches their shoes, they’re focusing on passive game because their pro-active game is weak as shit and girls end up checking out whether their belt and shoes match and choosing them based on dick size rumors. “ohh but I saw a video on youtube where the guy had a camera on his crotch and girls were looking at it” fucking who cares that’s passive game, fuck passive game you’re learning SEDUCTION not “stand and look pretty and hope the 10 you want decides to come jump on your cock while you durrr around like a chode” game.
And if that girl happens to, in particular, love P in V orgasms and hates foreplay (I’ve run into these types but they’re pretty rare in the same way that a guy who hates getting blowjobs exists but is rare, for most girls orgasms is orgasms and most of them haven’t felt G/Deep/A/etc. orgasms before (which all come with different feelings) so that shit is all new and exciting enough as it is for them to enjoy the sex), then ya, that particular size-queen type of girl might not call you back for another hookup and she’ll go chase the biggest dick she can find. That’s okay, these girls are rare and you have other girls on the go because you’re out in-field working on your game and actually seducing women to fuck them, not mentally masturbating in this comment section all day right?
10) The idea that a guy with a big dick will fuck MORE women is just like, how do you even come to that conclusion in a logical way? Again in social circle maybe, because he can fuck based on his reputation, but off cold-approach??? That doesn’t make any fucking sense. Girls don’t know who’s dick is what size, and they aren’t walking out on a guy who just gave them a bunch of orgasms just because he whips his dick out and it’s smaller than she expected the exact same way you probably aren’t kicking out that chick who’s been blowing you for 10 minutes and has you on the edge of an orgasm just because she takes off her shirt and she’s a little chubbier than you realized. It MIGHT affect retention/return-visitor rate because logically you could make that argument (tho again, size queens is a niche market, not the common market, and again we have to account for her pussy size shape etc etc), but you would have to pull some serious mental gymnastics to explain how dick size would affect cold approach lay count and most of those explanations you could come up with would be solved with better game the same way needing a nice watch can be solved with better game.
(I actually HAVE seen a girl laugh a dude out of a party for having too small a dick (jacked bodybuilder guy too) but it was because he was insecure about it and got pissed off and ran off which of course failing the shit-test just increased the laughter, whereas if he had played it cool like my little 5’2″ buddy would and just roll with it and suggest anal in a confident way he’d’ve passed the teasing shit-test instead of over-reacting and showing weakness and inviting a bombardment of jackal on prey behavior)
11) You know WHY a lot of girls place a lot of importance on P in V sex in self-surveys? Because most of the guys who read the shit I’m writing right now don’t actually DO this shit with girls so all girls have to judge sex by IS P in V because all these guys think “I just have to shove it in and jackhammer away as long as possible and that’s good sex” and they haven’t even squirted before or cum till they blackout or get Jamed Deen roughhandled etc. So all they can really go by IS the one move every guy does every fucking time lol
And I’m not even getting into actual kinks and bringing her personal fantasies to life and shit, there’s a whole nother WORLD of fun options there, while most guys are just railing away as hard as they can or fingerbanging as hard and fast as they can because it totally worked on Sally in high school brah trust me I know what I’m doing brah And I’m not even bringing up that James Deen just has a normal sized cock etc because we already went over the James Deen shit for 10 pages.
12) Now I’m not saying having a big dick is BAD (although as I’ve pointed out there are situations where it’s not ideal), and yes, there are girls out there that prefer a nice big dick, but the amount of chickens-with-their-head-cut-off nonsense I see grown men going through about the subject without doing any logical rational thinking, like, this is such a retarded thing to worry about lol Like does anyone even KNOW how to get girls off?? Is this a junior high school boy’s locker room where all anyone knows about sex is what they heard some other kid tell them about sex? You have the entire fucking internet at your fingertips to learn this shit. Being a good lay should be a hobby you enjoy learning about and getting better at if you want to go out picking up random girls.
And finally here are some tips, from a guy who’s just got a nice normal average dick nothing special, and is too out of shape to thrust away for 30 min lol:
1) in missionary position, lift her legs up to your shoulders so she’s knees to her chest and fuck her that way, it changes how shit is angled/shaped/squeezing and makes your dick feel bigger to her
2) if you want to increase the odds of her orgasming from P in V, start by using oral/fingers to get her off a couple times, so that she’s aroused as fuck (side note: you want to give her a couple orgasms before making her squirt too, trying to make her squirt off no build-up is tougher, again download Squirting 101 with Cytherea and watch the dude with the wristband explaining shit and how the other guy keeps fucking it up because he isn’t doing the right hand position and how easily it happens when you do it right and look for the clip with the asian chick and the timer at the end too). Then build up to her next orgasm but this time DON’T push her over the edge, when you feel her getting close to the edge just pull your tongue back and lightly kiss around her mound or thighs or lightly slowly graze your tongue around without touching her clit or pussy lips etc and just keep teasing her on the edge like that for a while, as her body calms down after a minute of not doing anything, keep going and tease her up to the edge again and back off etc etc She’ll be begging but just keep her on the edge…
Do that for a bit and, when she’s on the edge, THEN condom up (safety first) and slide inside her. If you’re sliding your dick in there just out of the blue with no build-up, you might make her cum from P in V but you’d better have some good cardio ’cause you’re turning that radio dial from like a 2 to a 10. Why not get the dial up to a 9 and THEN stick your dick in? Common fucking sense here lol This is pretty much my standard M.O. because I am chubby and out of shape with zero cardio so I can’t thrust for long I need to cheat lol They’ll usually end up cumming in under a minute of thrusting and from there it’s not real difficult to get them to keep cumming, it’s that initial one that’s the toughy.
3) Combine the number 2 edging shit with the legs up position from number 1, espeically after giving her a g-spot orgasm or two, and she’s not going to have any real complaints about your dick lol
4) and if you’re still concerned after all of this, stock some fucking toys in your kink drawer to bust out on her. Tie her up and get her off with them. Learn how to fist a girl safely. Use your fucking imagination lol
5) read the big James Deen discussion in my archives for shit about dominance leading etc and how that shit is more important during sex than a 12″ dick or jacked muscles lol
Worrying about the size of your dick is like saying “no one will want to go on a road trip with me because the windows in my car are manual instead of automatic”. It’s such a small part of a overall road trip that to me it indicates that the person saying it doesn’t even really understand how a car works, or why a road trip is fun, or what value other people get out of going on a road trip with them or how to make a road trip fun for their partner.
The fact that I have to even write this post and guys don’t already go out and figure this shit out for themselves (by doing their homework with porn and instructional material, and going out in-field and actually pulling and fucking girls and trying all this shit out on them), is why I end up fucking so many dissatisfied wives and girlfriends of other guys. Of ANYONE, the guys in a forum about seducing women should be at the fore-front of understanding all this shit already…if YOU guys don’t get it, and your HOBBY is trying to fuck women, the average Joe out there sure doesn’t get it. And then their girl fucks me and they go look up penis enlargement shit thinking THAT was his problem because he doesn’t understand basic fucking attraction.
And if you want to REALLY understand what I’m explaining, here’s an experiment you can do that none of you will actually do because it involves discomfort and risk and is SCARY and most guys are too in scarcity to fuck around with something like this (because they aren’t going out and pushing their sets to full-close sex enough):
Try this: Don’t fuck any of your next 10+ girls. No P in V. With all of them make up an excuse (back pain or your dick hurts from jacking off too hard or something or hell make up a fake STD, say you got tested and have chlamydia and are on a round of pills and don’t want her to catch it so we can’t do P in V this time till it’s cleared up, etc etc). POP-QUIZ HOTSHOT! NOW WHAT DO YOU DO? Shit!! You have to somehow satisfy this girl in bed, AND give her an amazing enough experience that she’s texting you wanting to hook up again, but you can’t do P in V…do you have the sexual skillset to still blow her mind and get her to come back begging for more? If you DON’T, if removing P in V neuters 90% of your sexual arsenal, then re-read this post and get studying and practicing and going out in-field because that shit means your sexual skillset is weak and limited and needs work.
Another experiment: no sticking anything in her pussy. See if you can give them a mind-blowing enough experience without even opening their pussy lips to where they’ll come back for more. This should be EASY for you especially if you bring out stuff like blindfolds and handcuffs etc. Learn to get them to the edge and just drive them wild for hours till you can make them cum with full-body shaking “can’t form coherent sentences afterward” intensity just by lightly blowing across their clit, or lightly grazing a fingertip over it or sliding the tiny little tip of your pink finger between their pussy lips, nothing deep inside their pussy required. Make P in V off-limits until the rest of your skills make up for however small your stupid dick is lol
My dick could get chopped off by a psycho girl (knock on wood aka mah dick lol) or I could get the herp or something and no longer have a dick to fuck a girl with and I would STILL be able to get girls wanting to come over to hook up with me for repeat business because I understand and am good at all this other shit. You guys should all be working on developing that if you’re going to be this big pickup player seduction badass
SUPPLEMENTAL (NON-YaREALLY) STUFF THAT NEWBIES SHOULD KNOW:
On Self Amusement
On Opening Girls Directly and Indirectly: